I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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