Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize