big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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