I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
