woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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