4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
