everyone is single if you try hard enough
even my farts smell like vagina
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
