I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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