We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize