you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
