I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
