lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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