nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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