you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize