Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
