I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
