Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
