why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
