yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
