yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
