I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
