There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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