good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
