I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
