A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
