Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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