like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
