His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
