But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
