Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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