I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
