Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
smell my finger.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
