Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
