i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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