If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
