I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
