i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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