Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
