on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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