Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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