She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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