He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
