Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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