She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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