i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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