I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
