He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
