last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
