i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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