return my video game
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
